Do you guys remember this dude named Scott Petersen? He did a thing…

So Scott was born, on a day, in a year that he was born because he was born.

Who did that?

So, I have some information the 411, the 114, the lowdown. Word on da street is that Scott is “confident” he will get out of jail one day. We have to laugh, and we shall now join me in the laugh circle:

You’re telling me that this bobble head, buttmunch, trifling ass hoe thinks he gonna get out of jail!?

Scott, do you NOT remember what landed you there in the first place. Like if you are out there yearning for freedom, I suggest not having murdered your wife and your unborn child. See, they have this thing called divorce. But NO. Not for Scott Pattershitsen.

Why? Because he got his bobble headed, useless ass crustacean, off brand jar of mayonnaise ass….. resentenced. Hahaha 😆 children, let us laugh AGAIN! Brenda! Bring the champagne 🍾

Scott to the courtroom: Your honor, your hair is beautiful today, btw

Judge Moody: Absolutely not. Book em!

And that is hot Scott Petersen went downnnnnn

Scott’s morning routine: ✨looks in mirror✨ Scotty, my man, you are innocent, you have done nothing wrong. And we will absolutely (not) get out of prison one day. We will see the sun. Breathe in the sky.

Judge Moody: PATTERSON! Did you just hear a damn word I said? And why are you in my chambers giving ya self a pep talk?

Scott: I-

Judge Moody: since you done told on ya self, imma have to put you in the slammer for life. Bye ✌🏽

Scott:

He cannot handle it.

💙L.W.